Just jerked away frustration anger disgust probably all too evident and rolled over as if what had

Just jerked away, frustration, anger, disgust probably all too evident, and rolled over, as if what had occurred (failed to occur) was somehow John's .. I need a word that isn't "fault". I wish I could think of one.His breath swirls around my neck I'm caught in a mint-flavoured slipstream He nibbles "I think you're just tired," he says. It's nice - in a galaxy far, far away it would once have been enough to have me tearful with gratitude - but these days I find affection hard to bear. Not only can't I get it up, I can't even turn around.An arm snakes round my chest, gives me a firm, no-nonsense hug. I stifle the urge to turn and ask him to repeat himself so I can clock whether his eyes are telling the same story as his mouth, but the effort required suddenly seems not merely enormous, but right off the scale of human endeavour.Perfect. What I say is: "I'm sorry." What I'm thinking is: I have nothing to apologise about. What's happened - what's not happened - isn't something I need be tormented by.

But "sorry" seems to be the easiest word: it's expected, needed to complete the banality of the scene. "I'm sorry." John says exactly what I expect him to say: "There's nothing to be sorry about."I have my back to him, so I can't see his face. Do I follow my dream or just fight a challenger who really doesn't mean that much? Holyfield brings the best out of me I want Evander Holyfield I owe him one," Bowe said.. Ratner said commission policy would allow both fights to go ahead.However, the real duel is between the rival promoters and pay television outlets - SET for the Tyson fight and TVKO for Bowe-Holyfield The question is which camp will blink first. King swears it won't be his side."We will not surrender at any cost," he said "If we suffer on this fight and on this date, so be it. We had the date first and we will not be bullied."According to Tyson's manager, John Horne, SET reserved the date earlier with distributors and made it clear months ago that Tyson would fight that day."TVKO, with advance knowledge, knowingly created this scheduling conflict," McAdory Lipscomb, executive vice-president and general manager of SET, said "We will not move off this date. It's a travesty for the consumer to have to make a choice only because one greedy company decided to rob the viewer by choosing a date that had already been secured for Mike Tyson's second fight."Bowe addressed the conflict in scheduling by saying: "I don't care if we fight Christmas Day as long as I fight Evander Holyfield." He was so anxious to fight Holyfield that he agreed to relinquish his World Organisation title - a precondition set by his opponent."Ever since the second fight I've been dying to fight Evander Holyfield again I was given the opportunity and I had to make a choice.

Of all the dates promoters could have picked for the Riddick Bowe-Evander Holyfield rematch, they chose 4 November at Caesars Palace in Las Vegas. That just happens to be the same date Don King has picked for Mike Tyson's second comeback fight, scheduled to take place just down the Las Vegas strip at the MGM Grand. Both attractions would seem to be television marketing bonanzas - a third showdown between Bowe and Holyfield and Tyson's next step back after three years in prison - but on the same night?According to Marc Ratner, executive director of the Nevada State Athletic Commission, the 4 November date was requested by Rock Newman, Bowe's manager, on 14 July Two days later, King requested the same date. Boxing There is a heavyweight showdown brewing - and it is not just between two fighters. After having her baby in October, she could begin preparing to win a place in Britain's team for next year's Olympics in Atlanta. Alternatively, she may concentrate her energies on a lengthy and costly court action in London or Monte Carlo.Court fight, page 22.

The timing is not certain, as the IAAF medical commission must first review the appeal evidence before deciding whether to recommend arbitration to the full council. The next commission meeting is not until October, although an extraordinary meeting could be held before then.The IAAF arbitration panel consists of three people chosen from an elected group of six IAAF members. The four- yearly election for candidates falls this year, however, so none of the six currently in place would be involved in any judgement regarding Modahl.In the meantime, the 29-year-old former Commonwealth 800 metres champion is technically able to compete again. "In fact, I would go further and say that the conditions in which this research was carried out were more stringent than those which applied within the Lisbon laboratory."The IAAF council meets next week in Gothenburg before the World Championships and the case seems certain to be referred to an arbitration tribunal. They have been tested many times."Referring specifically to the research which was presented on Modahl's behalf at late notice to the panel, which showed that faulty storage could increase testosterone levels in urine samples, Gyulai added: "We would like the opportunity to respond to the new evidence put forward to check whether it is good science or only a remote possibility."As the scientist responsible for preparing the evidence, Professor Simon Gaskell from the University of Manchester's Institute of Science and Technology, was in no doubt about his response yesterday "I would argue that it was good science," he said. Our responsibility is to make sure the sport is clean."If if is proved to us that what we are doing is wrong, then we are not stupid and stubborn people and we will change it. However, we believe that these testing procedures are watertight.